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Two 90 year olds had been dating for a while, when the man told the woman, “Well, tonight’s the night we have sex!”
And so they did.
As they are lying in bed afterward, the man thinks to himself, “My God, if I knew she was a virgin, I would have been much more gentle with her!”
And the woman was thinking to herself, “My God, if I knew the old geezer could actually get it up, I would have taken off my panty hose!”

(The Lingerie Department)
(read the rest at Grammas World)

The Lingerie Department
by Tony Hughes

This was a bad idea. Steve was surrounded by rows and rows of cream, white and black lace. He felt hemmed in by them and the accusatory glances of the women all around. He was embarrassed before he entered, but now his heart was pounding and his face was flushed. “That’s it,” he thought, “they all think I’m some kind of pervert!”

Steve was in the lingerie department of a ladies’ clothing store. He had thought that he would buy his wife an anniversary present, nothing too saucy or anything, but something straightforward, like a flattering nightie. But now he could see it had been a bad idea. He had been vaguely uncomfortable when he had accompanied his wife on brief forays into these literal no-man-lands, so he didn’t know what could have possessed him to think he could do it by himself.

He shut his eyes to calm down. “It was only a store,” he told himself “I’ve as much right to be here as anyone else.” He took a few deep breaths, opened his eyes, and looked around. In reality the few other shoppers (all female) barely gave him a second look. Breathing a sigh of relief, but still feeling the panic only a heartbeat away, he threaded his way out of the brassiere section and towards the nightgowns. The ones he stood before were all fairly long and ‘respectable’ and ranged from the satin effect material to more traditional white linen types.

As he perused them, thinking of what styles his wife preferred, he had the feeling he was being watched. He initially shrugged the sensation off as a return of his panic, but the feeling remained. Glancing round he saw that he was indeed being looked at. A red-headed sales assistant standing by the till was watching him carefully. Bemused Steve returned to making his selection. After a minute or so, he glanced at the sales assistant again. She was still looking at him hard. If Steve didn’t know any better he would have sworn she was appraising him in some way. Slightly concerned he moved a bit further away from her gaze, unfortunately towards the plainer nightgowns. He looked up again. She had shifted her position to get a better look at him. While he debated whether to leave the store or soldier on regardless, she came over to him.

“Excuse me sir, do you want any help?”

Steve looked up at her. She was definitely attractive. “Oh, yes” he replied awkwardly, and waved vaguely at the nightgowns.

(read the rest at GrammasWorld)
Always Gramma Always Free

The kids are away learning the reading, writing and arthimatic, and that leaves us at home to spend the days enjoying the quiet.

The way I enjoy my new found freedom is to check out hot sexy teachers like this one.   She is a cutie isn’t she;) You can find her another old broads to teach you lessons at Teacher Fantasies.com.

A young man goes to a whorehouse to expierence his first taste of sex.

The madam suggests that he start with 69. He decides to give it a try.

The prostitute leads him to a room, gets undressed, and instructs the young man to eat her pussy. Unfortunately, just as he starts she farts.

The man quietly says to himself, “phew”, but he goes down on her again.

A moment later she farts again. He says “phew”, but continues.

Once more she farts. This time he immediately gets up and starts walking out. She asks him what’s wrong, and he replies “I don’t think I can take another 66 of those!”

Cat and Mouse
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Cat And Mouse by Mike Hunt

One evening, after work, my best friend Cindy Miller and I went to the local health club for some much needed exercise! It was time to drop a few excess pounds, which we had picked up over the fall and winter. After all a girl wants to look her very best in a new bikini!

After our work out we stepped into the shower to wash off the sweat before going to dinner. As soon as we stripped off our gym clothes I saw something new. Cindy had the most beautiful tattoo of a dragonfly just above her left breast. I said, “Cindy where ever did you get that?” Cindy laughed and said, “It was a Christmas gift I gave myself. What do you think of it?” In response I said, “Cindy it’s absolutely beautiful! Where did you get it?” She told me the name of the tattoo parlor and then continued, “You should see the guy who did it. Talk about a hunk! I mean tall, well over six feet, muscular chest and the tightest little ass you’ve ever seen!” Cindy giggled and then continued, “Really Sarah you should get one. I mean you’ve been divorced for more than two years and it’s time to take the bull by the horns and assert yourself.” I wasn’t sure what my being divorced had to do with anything and I answered, “Oh I don’t know Cindy. I mean after all tattoos are sooo permanent and suppose after I get a tattoo I don’t like it?” She just laughed and said, “Don’t be silly!”

For the next week or ten days I thought a lot about whether or not I really wanted a tattoo. Finally I decided to do it.

One Friday evening after work I visited the tattoo parlor Cindy had told me about. The tattoo artist was everything Cindy said he was and then some! Tall, I guessed he was at least six-two, with a shock of wavy black hair, the tee shirt he was wearing revealed a muscular chest and arms, the bluest eyes I’d ever seen and a tight little butt. I was sooo busy sizing him up that I didn’t hear him when he spoke. Then he said, a little louder, “Yes Miss may I help you?” His smile revealed a row of even white teeth and I answered, “Er, uh yes I want to see about getting a tattoo.” He then asked, “Did you have any particular design in mind?” I replied, “Some kind of insect, I think.” He flashed that sexy smile again and said, “Follow me and maybe we can find just the right one!”

I followed him to a small room that he used as an office and said, “Have a seat and we’ll take a look.” He removed a book of insect tattoos from a shelf, sat down at his small desk and started flipping through it. I have to confess that my attention was split between the pictures he was showing me and him! I have to confess I was having thoughts about how he’d be in bed! “Sarah,” I said to myself, “It’s true that you haven’t slept with a man since your divorce, but get hold of yourself, you can’t just jump in bed with the first handsome hunk you meet!” Yet in spite of myself I felt my pussy getting wet.

I finally selected an especially beautiful and colorful butterfly and then Kurt asked me where I wanted it. I had intended to have it done above my left breast as Cindy had had her dragonfly, but instead I pointed to my left breast and said, “Right here!” Kurt smiled and stared at my chest for a minute and then he said, “I suppose you know that in order to place the tattoo there you’ll have to remove your bra and bare your breast.” I nodded my head and mumbled, “Uh huh.” Kurt said, “Then why don’t you come back at midnight? I never know who’ll walk in and we don’t want to put on a show. I close at midnight and we’ll have no spectators.” The thought of being alone with this handsome specimen caused me to get even wetter!

I don’t remember anything about the drive home that evening, visions of Kurt’s sexy, muscular body kept flashing before my eyes. When I pulled into my driveway I had completely soaked through my panties and onto the back of my skirt. Damn, I hadn’t been so turned on since my honeymoon. I rushed to my bedroom, stripped off all my clothes and went to bed with my eight-inch vibrator. Always before, when I felt horny my trusty, vibrating friend had relieved the tension, but though it produced several orgasms, this time it only served to increase my desire!

(read the rest FREE @ GrammasWorld)

Granny is Nasty!

This week we’re featuring the sexy and vibrant Lisa! This is one hot 65+ Gramma that knows how to take care of naughty young men like you! You can see more of her At Torrie.com where all the women are over the age of 55 and full of sexual energy that they want to burn off while you watch!
CLICK HERE TO CHECK OUT TORRIE!